For the third year in a row, Canada has won the prestigious "Colossal Fossil" award! On behalf of all Canadians, I graciously accept the award and would like to say the following:
"Thank you to the long haired jobless netizens who've mockingly granted Canada this award. I know many of you live off the largesse of the Canadian government and other western governments who have a tolerant view towards your particular brand of crazy. I'd like to pass on my appreciation to fellow 'fossils' Australia and Japan who've recently shared with Canada the illustrious 'Fossil of the Day' award. I personally, and I'm sure most Canadians, take great pleasure seeing the Japanese government persisting with the Whale hunt (for scientific purposes) and the Australian government doing everything to be SEEN to be doing something about it, while really doing nothing - you're an inspiration to us. I think it is very important that we continue not to commit to anything of any kind until the real polluters in this world - China and the US come to some kind of meaningful agreement that includes a plan for the up and coming polluters Brazil, India and Russia. I commit, on behalf of my fellow Canadians, that should the day come when a meaningful deal is thrashed out, with teeth, we will not only meet those international targets, we will beat them! Until then, we'll continue raping mother earth to provide free health care for all Canadians, having the most safe and secure banking system in the world and the best GDP to Debt ratio of any G7 country. One last thing, was this award trophy made from recyclable materials?"
Ok, jokes aside - I'm not one of those evil "climate change deniers". I'm more like one of those people who is sceptical of the science at the moment. Every time something happens, "Oh, that's because of global warming". Washington DC is buried in snow, more than most residents have ever seen - global warming. We've had a pretty wet winter and so far a pretty crap summer here in Australia - global warming. The Great Barrier Reef is dying - global warming. Parts of the Reef are recovering faster than expected - global warming. And on and on it goes.
I'm not a scientist - "Get out of here!" I hear you cry... Everything I've ever read suggests that the planet goes through these cooling and warming periods every so often. I've read things that suggest we're headed into an ice age because one is due - I've even read things that suggest this sudden warm snap over the last century (if you even believe that to be true) is a natural precursor to the ice age. That theory goes something along the lines of that crazy hollywood movie where the North Atlantic current is cooled by colder water from the melting ice caps and the oceans suddenly drop in temperature and BOOM, we're living in a winter wonderland.
The delicate issue is - what if all the moderates are right and something is going on? We should do something to at least make a stab at reversing it or slowing it down. To do that though, let's face it - without the US, China, India, Russia, Japan, Europe and Brazil signing on the dotted line it has no hope. You are talking about 60% of the world's population right there and what, 90% of the total emissions? Running around handing out mock awards to Canada for not "being a leader" is crazy. You could add a full 1.0% of unemployment to the Canadian economy and lower GDP by 0.5% - massively more than anyone is calling for and you'd not even make a blip in the problem that is climate change if the people who are espousing the theory are to be believed!
I live in Australia, where the Prime Minister of the day was pushing for some pretty crazy environmental programmes to be pushed through without proper economic (or environmental modelling) so that he could go to Copenhagen and be an Eco-Hero. Thankfully the opposition killed that because nobody really knew what the impact would be for Australia or the planet. This was a politician looking for his Nobel Prize and the impact economically wouldn't come until after his next re-election so it didn't matter short term. That's its own kind of sick and perverse if you ask me.
My feeling is that people need to stop turning up to these global events and protesting without a common cause and focus on small wins. Baby steps - the journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step. Look at CFCs - the world saw the science that these were bad for the Ozone layer and globally they were taken out of production - a win for the environment. Instead of looking for these massive all encompassing treaties that enforce drastic targets on countries whether or not they can afford it is stupid especially in the democratic countries. Anytime things get bad economically, some party will pop up and say that the environmental movement is killing jobs and bang the planet becomes the enemy of employment. I don't know the answers, but maybe lower targets that are achievable, more money to developing nations for new technology so they don't become contributors to the problem or whatever - maybe start there, get that signed off and agreed. The come back in three years and look for a little bit more. If the science and evidence starts piling up that there is a major problem, then people will act faster.
Anyway, thanks for the award on behalf of all Canadians - this won't impact a single vote in the next federal election, so good on you for wasting your time. How many tonnes of CO2 were wasted on organising this prize?
